Tag Archives: anxieties

Comforting thoughts of going home

07 Saturday Apr 2018

Posted by in Art, community, Health, pets, therapy, Warm fuzzy

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I recently pushed my limits with social anxieties.

I was proud with how I kept it together at a public event last month. Yeah, I lasted about an hour and a half. 

The event was a mid-week fund raiser for a local agency that provides temporary shelter plus mental health support for the homeless and those caught in the claws of addiction.

Based on the ticket cost, the quality of the tasty treats, wine and dignitaries in attendance, I could soon tell I was in with a different crowd.

According to the suggested starting bids for the items in the silent auction and the live auction, I felt a sense of disparity between the purpose of the event and the money flowing from attendees. I felt disappointment at the waste of food and lack of sustainable measures taken for composting and recycling.

I was certainly in with a different crowd.

The one thing that kept me staying longer than I wanted was to see if anyone else would outbid me on a quilt in the silent auction. I lingered beside the table, nursing my wine while wincing at the loud music from the speakers and the over-excited voice of the live auctioneer. I had my fill of food and wine. I had my fill of social interactions.

The quilt appealed to me because my paternal grandmother used to make them – back in the day when they used scrap material and there was symbolism, cultural meaning in the patterns.

The quilt appealed to me because of the comforting feeling it can represent, a feeling like a loving home, like a soft blanket wrapped around you, holding you tight and assuring that everything is going to be alright.

It also appealed to me because it was one of the less-expensive items on the table. 

Quilt on futon

I approached the people at the registration desk and explained my need to leave. They assured me it was okay and that they would call my cell number later if I had the winning bid.

And they did.

I was soon the proud owner of a locally crafted quilt. I like how it adds to the colour and comfort of my quiet, humble home. 

Tabby cat on quilt on futon

Miss Geneva Tabby checks out the new quilt on her futon

I have a home. For that I am grateful.

Thank you for stopping by.

 T
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More crowded gatherings tests

30 Sunday Jul 2017

Posted by in Art, community, Mythology, writing

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Last weekend I attended the Capital Ukrainian Festival.

I was looking forward to music, cultural crafts and … perogies.

I was also challenging my aversion to crowds, spending hours in the hot sun and lining up for food.

Ukrainian dancers on stage

Capital Ukrainian Festival – dancers

The musicians and dancers certainly entertained the visitors in the hot afternoon sun. There were all kinds of vendor tents and scheduled tours of the church.

Capital Ukrainian Festival- tents and church

Capital Ukrainian Festival

I abandoned my quest for perogies and other tasty treats due to the long lineups in the hot sun. The shaded merchant tent was more appealing for my delicate complexion and conducive to locating inexpensive, practical items. I found some colourful, blank greeting cards for sending to family and friends. Yes, I’m one of the people who still do that.

I was attracted to the watches displayed by one of the merchants. I was also curious about the symbols on the watch face.

watches brochure

Ukrainian festival – watches brochure

Coat of arms:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coat_of_arms_of_Ukraine 

It was the Tryzub Cross. I was curious to learn more. The Tryzub Cross is simply a cross-bar on the middle tine of a tryzub.

But what is a ‘tryzub’? And why should it have a cross-bar? ‘Tryzub’ (тризуб) is Ukrainian for “trident” and is one of Christianity’s earliest symbols. A trident with a Cross is associated with St. Vladimir the Great (980–1015).

Read more here: http://www.seiyaku.com/customs/crosses/tryzub.html

The merchant explained the history and practices of the watch manufacturer plus let me try on a couple of the ladies’ models. I didn’t commit to purchasing one right away yet accepted the brochure for something to look at while I digested the price! If you have the means and time to learn more about these beautiful watches, you can visit the vendor’s web site at http://kleynodwatches.com/

Eventually during my wanderings, I came across plenty of Ukrainian Easter eggs.

Did you know…? The word pysanka comes from the verb pysaty, “to write”, as the designs are not painted on, but written with beeswax.

Read on here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pysanka

Pysanska souvenir egg

Pysanka souvenir egg

That appealed to me. Pysaty. To write.

This weekend I also wrote (well… typed) in my other blogs. Drop by if you have the curiosity and time. It won’t cost you much.

Thanks for dropping by.

T

Wherever you go – it may be raining

06 Saturday May 2017

Posted by in Art, Food and Cooking, Health, pets, therapy, Travel

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Spring travel whisked me away from the rainy Ottawa Valley to Vancouver Island.

It rained there too. 

My objectives were made months in advance:

  • Travel somewhere within Canada
  • Push my air travel anxiety limits – further than before
  • Visit with family
  • Do touristy things
  • Do not think about work

My destination was Vancouver Island, just off the coast of British Columbia. The long stretches of flying, sitting, waiting, flying, sitting, etc. tired me out. At various destinations I welcomed opportunities for walking tours and restaurant outings. Soon that tired me out too!

I practiced mindfulness as much as I could, savouring moments and reminding myself to breathe.

One family member took me for a drive up the east coast of Vancouver Island, humoured my request to stop where I could dip my toes into the Pacific Ocean.

Theresa dipping her toes into the west coast ocean waters

Pacific Ocean (well… some inlet) I am in you!

Soon I was on a bus then another bus to the beautiful city of Victoria. I was happy and comforted that relatives were waiting for me, extra umbrellas in hand to provide an escort to my hotel.

While in Victoria, I was treated to sufficient walking excursions, visited a castle and tried food from different restaurants. We had one sunny, windy day.

I spent one rainy afternoon by myself, enjoying bright flower gardens and inhaling the scent of trees in full blossom.

Flowers rain Victoria

A rainy tourist outing in downtown Victoria

A wet park bench

A wet bench and colourful flowers

Soon one of my adult children joined me after his own cross-country tour by train, ferry and bus. He got to meet one set of cousins for the first time. He accompanied me for a walk by the docks, an appropriate lunch and a walking tour up to Emily Carr House.

Lunch at Red Fish Blue Fish – Victoria

As with my tour of the castle a couple of days earlier, we exited through the gift shop and I picked up a few souvenirs.

Blonde Lady sitting at tea table in Emily Carr house

A chance to sit down during a tour of Emily Carr house

Did I achieve my objectives?  Yes! I practiced mindfulness moments wherever I was, taking in the experiences, breathing in and breathing out.

After a long day of travel east, I returned to Ottawa in the rain. I observed the local news about severe spring flooding in our region.

I was glad to be home, to have the chance to do laundry and rest in my creature comforts.

Snuggles was glad to see me too and perform his morning routine of waking me up to serve breakfast and read the online news together. Creatures of habit…

Black cat on lap

“Good. You’re back where you belong – with me!”

Thanks for dropping by.

T